Tuesday, April 08, 2008 ' 1:20 AM
on a rainy afternoon like today, yes i am still rotting at home, waiting for my stupid leg to heal. much to my surprise, i'm very very much ok compared to previous weeks (: i will be fine soon.
i don't know where my feelings all came rushing from, it's gushing out, and i'm going to blog them all...
remember probably 10 years ago when i was a12 year old, i left the primary school, thinking i would miss most of my primary school mates, crying and weeping because everyone were going separate ways. and then some kept in contact for a good 10years, but most were even farther than before.. some went overseas, some are so near, yet so far. and some, i probably wouldnt even recognise them now if we were to pass by each other on the streets.
moving the clock slightly 6years ago when we all started seconday school, it was the best times in my life. i met the best people in my life. i had them all kept well, and treasured well.. for they are the best things, best people that can ever happen in my life. i cannot help but think that i will never get the kind of innocent happiness ever again, and i'm quite sure of that. although those were all memories, i'm really glad i had them all kept even till now. the best thing in life now is that they are not just part of my memories, butthey are part of my everyday life.
my friends, u all know who u are, there's no need to specify because u all would know who i'm referring to. yes all u darlings who never fail to be there for me (:
and then there were new relationships, failed relationships. sealed and kept. and then there is no relationship now. which i'm happy enough because i don't see myself in one now or in near times.
and soon i meet more people from jc from poly... and then there were most acquaintances but a few heartfelt ones. and those that we went through thick and thin in Cambodia, those memories hold the friendship really strong. those things we all did together, stupid and funny, high and low... we love them all, we see true friendships then.
and i met a few heart to heart friends from swensens. those that i need not say much about cos they are beyond words. they are just so part of me.
and now it's time to step into the real society for me. i have no idea what to expect, what to be. but i am trying to be an idealistc girl, someone fresh, someone new and ready to purge. it's a first job after graduating, it's my dream job, it's my passion. i want to do it well, and we shall all see when i start. give me luck, give me blessings, give me support. (:
and then i start to picture myself in another few years time... i feel relieved that i see images of familiar faces, because i hope it turns out that way. i dunno if everyone feels the same, but there are some people in my life, that i never want to miss out. that i never want them out of my life...
thinking back of those days we all had small misunderstandings of each other, thinking back those bad times where everything took a change in our friendships, now i want them all rewind. now i know it's not possible to rewind, but i want to play now, and see myself and see them in my life again, and forward it one day, seeing that they are still very well kept and loved in my life.
i must have been thinking too much. emotional girl? no!!!
i'm soooooooooo trapped at home everyday, and i haven seen anyone, any friends for the past i dunno how long. and of cos, i'm really missing alot alot of people.
i could so just imagine myself and thinking back of good old times:
with ezah drinking bubble tea and watching movies at her place
with lixia talking endlessly at some void decks or walking aimlessly through the night just to have heart to heart chats
with yan, xian, jenny.. sitting around at some starbucks drinking caramel macchiato and shaking leg, loving our life
with yingtao eating buffets, shouting out loud at each other, laughing at anything everything
with laoda talking so much about life and philosophy, healthy diets and jogs
with the lee family having steamboat, playing mahjong.. bullying jin lee, and being bullied by jin nan
with the sisters rotting around at cafes, zh's house doing nothing but updating juicy parts of our lives
with my ball shopping, eating, talking, laughing. everything.
my goodness. the list goes on. trust me. i miss, everyone, everything.
♥dedicated compassion and loves.
