it was a long and tiring day, but fruitful. am glad compensation revision lecture is beneficial, and today is HRMS last tutorial, yesterday was TD last tutorial, next week will be studt week already. i have to really mug and buck up alot alot.

first aid course was fun! time seems slow, but we learnt a lot of things. i like it. learning new things is a challenge! hee. (: plus i've got ezah to be crapping with me! hahhaas! after lesson we went ps to have long john silvers and guess what? hahas, we saw xian. yupps, so ezah and xian found their companion to go home together.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LAO DA!!! (:

tmr is gyming with erika toe and camen toe, nancy can't join cos she's got something held up at home. hmm, how about the other toes?! yupps, gyming will be cool (:
i'm in the midst of planning my running schedules in preparation of Great Eastern, and am contemplating to go to new balance boutiques to try out the shoes and buy one soon. running starts as my big plan now.
sunday morning will be meeting that naughty devil to have a morning jog, starting with zone 1. hahahas! and then we will go get shoes. yayys! (:

life's happy, no complains, no woes.

yes, i'll buy you eclairs, if u'd _______ . (:

monday, blues... yes, i always get that.
tmr is my first aid course, first lesson. i hope it will be good, but anyway i will be with ezah so the nurse will guide me better. hee. :)
took erika's dad's car ride to bishan to take bus home. hmmm... it was funny cos we were talking about MY personal matters, and her dad was sofunny. as funny as erika can get, and the conversation did make me happier over the issue. haha, thanks erika toe!

we're going to the BA mafia prom!

im tired, mentally tired and drained. stop asking me questions i don't know how to answer, and instead of relieving my problems, im very much burdened by u all. thanks.

it's only monday and i'm already thinking of what i'm gonna do on sunday. ppl who know, shhhhh... my secret! my 'mission'.. hee. :)

sunday!
great day, fun day, fruitful day.
went for the talk at KK hospital with ezah, really motivating, and we will train hard for the Great Eastern Run, yan, must train wor! (: first, is to buy my shoes when i get my pay this month. new balance? dunno yet, will see how. all in all, motivated to eat right, train right.

watched ALONE, with yan, xian, jenny, kailin and ezah. yes yes yes, it's horror, and yes yes yes it's comedy cos i was there in the theatre. LOL. all of them were practically laughing at me cos i screamed at the least scary part, in fact, not scary part. you all should know me ma... i'm like.. forever like that. hahaha.. and i slapped ezah's leg uncontrollably cos i was scared+laughing non-stop. nice storyline. (:

i wanna watch 881!!! and the simpsons! yippee!

the weekends were lovely. i'm, from the bottom of the heart kind of happy. thank you all my friends! loves!!! (:

h.a.p.p.y (: it sums up all.
sakura international buffet was good!!! with the right companion as well, Ying Tao. i didn't manage to take alot of pictures cos my hp died on me after a phone call. there it goes:

peek-a-booo!!!
i was in sch since 9am to 6pm today!! really commendable! hahahas. and we submitted our integrated project report, woohoo! thanks the toes for all the effort put in for all the projects! yayys!! liberation! (:
exams are up soon, in a few weeks time, gotta really mug like hell considering my TD n COMP papers are 7o%.

i've got myself three hot dates today! hahaha! sunday to meet ezah, saturday is dining date with yingtao, the international buffet awaits us! and next monday dinner-ing with kim! woohooo~ quite packed eh? yar man! not forgetting that yan, xian and i have an agreement to watch the movie: ALONE. hahaha, u gals will let me sit in between right? PLEASE?!
ezah, the simpsons movie is out soon, so when shall we catch it together?!

realise how happy i am? I AM HAPPY! i'm having those teethy-wide-smiles from east to west. no whys, i'm just.. so... happy.. hee hee (:

yippee-ya-ya-yippee-yippee-ya~

AND I WANNA MEET JOYCE DEARIE SOON! so sorry for all the changes, next week? now that projects are over, presentations were past tense, tutorials and lectures are endangering, we shall meet and chill and eat pasta at the sketches!! misses dearie! (:

一天过一天 明天再见这是你每次说的
一直都没有改变你的无奈
我知道你的心已不在放开
这是最好的决定你的爱
已不在 我为什么还在这发呆
我为什么还爱你 为什么还想着你
不是我不放弃 是什么原因 你狠心把我丢在这里
我为什么还爱你 为什么还想着你
不是我不放弃是什么原因 你狠心丢我在这里
一天过一天 明天再见这是你每次说的
一直都没有改变你的无奈
我知道你的心已不在放开
这是最好的决定你的爱
已不在 我为什么还在这发呆
我为什么还爱你 为什么还想着你
不是我不放弃是什么原因 你狠心把我丢在这里
我为什么还爱你 为什么还想着你?
不是我不放弃是什么原因 你狠心丢我在这里
我为什么还爱你 为什么还想着你
(想着你)不是我不放弃是什么原因
你狠心把我丢在这里

was reading the latest issue of her world magazine, i'm surprised by how Eunice Olsen is an idealist. why do some people have something against her when she is just living her passions? i think she plays a multi figure in our society hoping to reform something, and instill the needs for everyone to know how important it is to share a part of ourselves for volunteerism. i enjoyed reading the article very much. (:

my house water heater was announced spoilt this afternoon. i was so afraid that i had to go under the cold showers. then, it struck me so hard, and i'm so ashame of myself for the fear. so many of us, born with such luxuries and comfortable zones with things we take for granted. pampered with things we thought were necessities. surrounded with safety zones and protection that we take it as what we ought to have and deserve.

as i was trying to overcome the fear of going under the cold showers, i was telling myself i should just treat it like i went swimming and the swimming complexes definitely didn't have water heaters. suddenly, the thought of less fortunate people from third world countries don even have proper water systems hit me hard. and the vivid images of cambodia kids and people practically bathing, cooking, eating, drinking. relieving, playing and swimming, along one brown and contaminated river protruded so clearly in my mind. yes, brown.
the thoughts and images slapped me as hard and as painful as a forceful one i could have given myself.

please pardon me for taking all the things for granted, i will learn to appreciate and treasure things that i have, and make do with things i don't have or have lost along the way.

as i was going home from work just now, there was a little girl with down-syndrome, her features wasn't obvious but her actions spoke about her. she was screaming at the top of her lungs, her mum assured her she'd be fine, eventually she stopped. i smiled to her, and she looked at me puzzled, but slowly she handed her hand out to me, smiled and said a faint hello. her mum looked at me and smile (her smile showed so much tiredness she has, the kind of smile that said thank you for accepting her), when i alighted at my station, i felt so depressed, so upset i think i was near tearing. the kind of heart-wrenching feel, the throat stuck with words so heavy to be expressed.

all the more i've decided to pursue my humanitarian goal. people, please always remember, show them (any needy person) the kind of compassion (not to pity them or bring them down further) that will pull them up and bring them further in days to come. a smile can mean as much.

then as i was walking home from the mrt station, this phrase came knocking on me.
"love, is not about you and me, you or me, but we and everyone around us"

我发现站了好久 不知道要往哪走
还不想回家的我 再多人陪只会更寂寞
许多话题关于我 就连我也有听过
我的快乐要被认可 委屈却没有人诉说
夜半信仰丛白剥落 拿掉防卫剩下什么
为什么脆弱时候 想你更多

如果你也听说 有没有想过我
想普通交朋友 还是你依然会心疼我
好多好多的话想对你说 悬着一颗心没着落
要怎么附和 舍不得 又无可奈何

如果你也听说 会不会相信我
对流言会附和 还是你知道我还是我
跌跌撞撞才明白了许多 冷漠的人就你一个
想到你想起我 胸口依然温柔

许多话题关于我 就连我也有听过
我想我宁可都沉默 其实反而显得做作
夜半信仰丛白剥落 拿掉防卫剩下什么
为什么脆弱时候 想你更多
如果你也听说 有没有想过我
想普通交朋友 还是你依然会心疼我
好多好多的话想对你说 悬着一颗心没着落
要怎么附和 舍不得 要无可奈何

如果你也听说 会不会相信我
对流言会附和 还是你知道我还是我
跌跌撞撞才明白了许多 冷漠的人就你一个
想到你想起我 胸口依然温柔

如果你也听说 有没有想过我
想普通交朋友 还是你依然会心疼我
跌跌撞撞才明白了许多 冷漠的人就你一个
想到你想起我 胸口依然温柔
如果你想起我 你会想到什么

super nice song, the first time i heard it on radio, it could prick my heart and feel the lyrics so much. it feels as if the song speaks a story so painful. meaningful, i like (:

the face issue is QUITE over, but i'm just so afriad there might be scarring cos i scratched this one part that there's this raw wound there. TSK! hope it heals fast cos i look weird, but much much better than it first plagued on thursday (:

thanks JY for those concerns, and wanting to buy me masks from China! HAHAHS! do they work? ask ur female colleagues to try first then tell you good or not. or ask them for recommendations. good then u buy for me, no good then nvm! HAHAHAS!! (:

saturday was superb cos i had a great chat with angeline and now that she ends work the same time as me, it's so great! ack to the days we take bus home together! hahhas!
went PS for dinner with mum and sis, Crystal Jade has the worst Q-ing time but nonetheless we went there cos mum wanted that. not bad, but i won't say it's the best food we could have.
ezah came to bunk over at my place cos today was mizuno wave run! bunking and watching the eye with my sis was great! hahhas! i dozed off nearing the end, HEYS! I WATCHED THE SAME VCD (HER VCD) FOR MORE THAN 3 TIMES!! lols!

mizuno wave run! not bad, weather was cooling but the running trails at bedok reservoir was really....... wet and muddy with pools. we were quite splashed by mud pools but it was great. ezah, yan and me took 5kn fun run while lao da had 10k competitive run. there were so many ppl, it was chaotic. but i think it's fun after all. i think i'm doing a little better in runs, this was better than milk run, personally. so i think i might do better in shape run. (ya ya ya, i know i should start training NOW, so i CAN do better in shape run and not MIGHT do better.)
there are like a tons of runs to choose from, but we decided to give Sheares bridge a miss, can consider Great Eastern Women Run, but well we'll see how rite girls?! (:

pictures says louder than words! so, there u go:

i've got mc and need to stay at home for a few days. i'm very much disfigured, don ask me why, cos i'm now so paranoid and upset over my face. sigh...
sunday's run has to go on, but i dunno how i should hide my hideous face now... roars!

i just emailed mrs tit with regards to my absence in school today, and she hasn't reply me, guess i needa make up class next week or something if not my attendance will go below the standard and then she may just bar me from my exams. please let it not be the case.

since i'm like so super free now, i think i wanna go surf for nice skins to have a change. nice blog skins i mean, not my face skin. but if there is such a thing please do let me know. lols...

i'm sucha slacker. tsk tsk tsk!

wow wow wow! so many people are going away next semester. i don't know if it's wrong to choose staying in school last sem.
Yuhong and JieYing will be going China for IAP, ZhiHua will be away to China too, for immersion programme. Angeline, WenTing, Jasmine Lim off to 6months IAP.
of course i would still have the toes, yvette, huiqi around but it's quite saddening to hear them confirmed going off for next sem, all for so long. and dunno when i get to see them again. arrhhh.. okie, too early to be sad over the leavings. hahahs. (:

i'm starting to love my breakfasts so much. it's been two weeks that i'm under diet maintanence. not only has it helped me maintain good digestive works, now that stomach flus have really said goodbye, it also helped me achieve some weight management. hahahs!
i'm having Honey Bunches of oats and cereals right now, yummy-li-cious.

as requested: Junyong, where are you? hahahas. THIS GENTLEMEN HERE actually msged me just to ask me to see my tagboard. and then we had to 'chat' a little through my tagboard cos according to him, china don have msn but got some QQ stuffs that i also dunno what he is trying to say. LOLS! the conversation is as tagged on the board. and there's this one last sms he text-ed,
and i only saw it this morning: in about 2 months time, u'd see a GIANTMRBLUES (considering the fact that i call him littlemrblues for all his emo-ing last time), cos these china clients do nothing but eat eat eat n eat and drink drink drink drink. liquor all the times.
and i just replied: soon, u'd be coming home with a belly, hope u're not balding! haha! (:
hahhas. heys, thanks my friend. u're appreciated for all said. it made my day, and yes now that there's tons of things u owe me when u come back? can i list?! hahahs. take care there! (u can sms me as many as u want, cos i've called to check, as long as u're using a singapore mobile number, it's not going to make a difference in my bill. HAHAHAS! it's you who's gonna pay alot. and u seriously don wan to put me through those QQ n SKYPE setting up processes, unless u wan to see me in an explosion state of frustrations cos i'm so dumb at setting these stuffs.)
till then (:

i'm gonna be so looking forward to saturday! hahahas! someone's bunking in at my place. i charge rent ok! HAHAHHAHAS! mizuno wave run is sunday.

today is working day. gotta run to work soon. nancy text to say that self selecting of timetable is on 18th september. hmmm, i've seriously no idea what paths i would choose, what electives i'd take, and what IS to choose. i guess i will wait till i login to the page n see what they offer me, n pick something that will fit my work schedule, and not too packed or slack in between would do. (:

there's no point commenting or saying anything about anyone anymore. it causes destructions. people, the next time you want to blog about your deep felt thoughts, i suggest we all do a thorough check and do edits to erase or strike off the negative words n names. words through blogs can simply cause major destructions to people's everyday life. technology has taken its turns such that now quarrels and fights can be made virtual but real through the web.

bye! hee! i'm off to work.

i hate to be blogging about negative stuffs once i start on this typing pad. but it's building up in me, and it's certainly getting on my every nerves!
i don't know what's the freaking problem, and what exactly went wrong. it's as though first it's my fault, then it was publicised and then next it's a total cut off. isn't it weird how two person can be besties at one moment and the next we can't even text each other?! now that texting has to be through her bf! how infuriating! dammit!
i never wanted to cut ties off totally, and i never wanted all these to just go down the drain FOR NOTHING. if i say i didn't feel anything when i read those things, i am definitely lying. and if i were to say i didn't feel anything for losing something i thought was so close and precious, i am heartless. what was worse? there were so many times i wanted to just text and say i'm sorry for all the things that had happened but the thought of what has all been publicised just made me think twice if i should even apologise.
what's worse now? that all it's left is a middle party passing messages, which i felt was total redundant, plus... it's just goes to prove even more to me that i meant nothing, at all.
sorry for the rants.

TEN TONS was great, efforts go to the main comm people who made it possible, and i'm really glad yvette darling was with me throughout the event. i missed her so much, and it wasn't exactly catching up, but it felt great with her presence again. loves, girl. (: and thanks to all the student volunteers and my student leaders who made it possible for our area to be a success. thanks loads.

i'm totally thrilled to have done something on sunday, and it's gonna be fun fun and fun! i'm also joining a land and sea expedition to TRY and complete my NYAA award, hahhas! i hope i can though.

yuhong has our cambodia letters and i'm patiently waiting for him to be free to pass me the letters. we are all anxious and excited to get them. i miss my kids so much. sooo much. not forgetting to mention that i miss lesley six so much, and fhcc.stonage sisters. the kind of bonding...

ezah and i are gonna see each other almost every other day in august! hahhas! c'mon gal, u're gonna love it i know~ lols! First Aid course is gonna be fun and she's gonna take a day off for our mugging of first aid exam. hahas!

projects are almost done, JUST ALMOST. there is one last final report yet to be done, i need to get the executive summary done for erika to edit and thanks erika toe for all the editing works. we all know it's tiring, but THANKS A HUGE LOAD. swimming tmr! (:

why must i made to feel down when i'm not the involved party?!
yingtao, where are you!? :(

currenlty, only this song's been on my repeat list:

"A Lonely September"
I'm sittin' here all by myself
just tryin' to think of something to do
Tryin' to think of something, anything
just to keep me from thinking of you
But you know it's not working out
'cause you're all that's on my mind
One thought of you is all it takes
to leave the rest of the world behind
[Chorus]
Well I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did
And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did
And you didn't mean to love me back, but I know you did

I'm sittin' here tryin' to convince myself
that you're not the one for me
But the more I think, the less I believe it
and the more I want you here with me
You know the holidays are coming up
I don't want to spend them alone
Memories of Christmas time with you
will just kill me if I'm on my own
[Chorus]
Well I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did
And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did
And you didn't mean to love me back
I know it's not the smartest thing to do
we just can't seem to get it right
But what I wouldn't give to have one more chance tonight
One more chance tonight

I'm sittin' here tryin' to entertain myself with this old guitar
But with all my inspiration gone it's not getting me very far
I look around my room and everything I see reminds me of you
Oh please, baby won't you take my hand
we've got nothing left to prove

[Chorus]
Well I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did
And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did
And you didn't mean to love me back, but I know you did
And I didn't mean to meet you then we were just kids
And I didn't mean to give you chills the way that I kiss
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did
And you didn't mean to love me back but I know you did
Don't say you didn't love me back 'cause you know you did
No, you didn't mean to love me back
But you did

wondering where i've been?
i am currently buried under a pile of stuffs named projects. but the pile has slowly lessen by this time, the crucial part is tmr. the presentation!!!! oh man, we'll do well (: we have to.

there's so much to say but everytime i want to blog, things just don't seems to flow out.
nites.

TODAY! it's one of the MOST fulfilling days ever and we did all the things we are doing for the first time! the list of things i managed to acomplish with Ezah:
1. TPSC (finally! and yupp, the FIRST time) -photos up laterr.
2. lunch-ing at forks & spoon (for the FIRST time too, the vegetarian meal was filling and satisfying.)
3. Paid at RCTC for our standard first aid course where she just won't stop laughing at the mention of first aid course... she knows why and i won't mention anymore! HAHAHHAS!
4. Went to RELC, near Orange Grove, to the idp to enquire about her future endeavours. HAHA
5. to bpp for some FISH times, the new fish&chips there is cheap and tasty.
6. SOUR PLUM MILK TEA WITH GREEN APPLE JELLY
7. BANANA GREEN TEA WITH PEARL (where the aunty went totally shocked n surprised by our orders! HAHAHAHS! *hilarious*)

that's all the first times i mentioned. hahahhas!

then i had my favourite dish from her grandma, the nasi lemak and the sambal chilli just taste incredibly DELICIOUS!!! yummy yummy yum! and i overload on carbo today. but who cares man! i had a great wonderful day!! (:
then off to meet xian for some mahjong-ing at jn's. hmmm, it was fun i guess? hahhas. but as i was playing my mind was kinda drifted off to PROJECTS! lols. thanks chin nan for the chicken chop, it wasn't awful, i was just tooooo full. and thanks for offering to send me home, not that i dun appreciate, just that it's toooooo far. (:

classic song, complex lyrics, nice music:

我不知道为甚麽这样
爱情不是我想像
就是找不到往你的方向
更别说怎麽遗忘
站在雨里
泪水在眼底不知道该往那里去
心中千万遍不停呼唤你
不停疯狂找寻你
我是不是该安静的走开
还是该勇敢留下来
我也不知道那麽多无奈
可不可以都重来
我是不是该安静的走开
还是该在这里等待
等你明白我给你的爱
永远都不能走开
站在雨里泪水在眼底
不知道该往那里去
心中千万遍不停呼唤你
不停疯狂找寻你
我是不是该安静的走开
还是该勇敢留下来
我也不知道那麽多无奈
可不可以都重来
我是不是该安静的走开
还是该在这里等待
等你明白我给你的爱
永远都不能走开

every word and line speaks.

time check: 1.20AM. it's one of the very productive times these days.
i've just finished off with a rather productive moment. integrated project done compiled, TD done brainstormed, emails done sent. now what is undone? SLEEP!

good night!

TD report(my parts) procrastinated till tomorrow cos as much as i want to get it done, the mind keeps drifting off to lala lala lala land. nites!!!
i'm so gonna love tomorrow. muackies!

-who said someone can only shed tears with context of l.o.v.e, for a lover?

the weather is sooooo super duper hot! i almost lose my cool, no no. i lost my cool when we were trying to find somewhere we could just sit down and have a proper lunch! nancy and i went up n down hills just to find our lunch. in the end we had to pack our lunch and ate outside LT51! it was soooo hot! man, she knew i was gonna lose all my cool if she were to talk to me. so yupps, she kept quiet throughout, unless i talk. hahhas. i can be real hot-tempered when it's so freaking hot! LOLS.

comp lecture was fine, hrms tutorial was lame. for all the tutorials for hrms to come, it's all gonna be so lame. lappy with admin work, thats all. yawns!

i love wednesdays (:

it's monday. school was fine, everything's fine for the first day. jac fong is back for TD tutorials, she's got a baby girl! (: congrats ms fong! i must say she's a thousand times better than the relieve tutor last term. hahas! am glad, she's back... now that TD is alot more productive. hees.

milk run yesterday was...... long, but not tiring. long not cos the distance was long. it was the waiting time that was long. lao da flaged off at 3.30pm for competitive run (8.4km), and we flagged off at 4.40pm! that is a long wait! we almost wanted to just sit there and rot till lao da finishes his race. hahhahhas! but i'm happy we didn't! cos we did flag off, but it was so crowded that we had to started off by walking/strolling. we only started running half way when the crowd started to disperse. great run. love it. it wasn't tiring, it wasn't hot. just nice.

ezah's taking a day off on thursday! yipppee! i'm delighted! hahhas. we've got BIG GREAT PLANS to accomplish! lols! asam pedas please? LOLS!!! (:

junyong: yet another trip ya! 3months is long!!! but nonetheless, enjoy it dude! Guangzhou is fun!! i know it cos i've been there! shopping is like so super cheap! (**hint hint**) go go! bon voyage and take care friend! (:

oh ya, thanks for the bluntness. it just all boils down to the fact that i'm an untruthful person, and thanks for letting me know i'm sucha person who just cannot speak up. yupp. even if i were to be someone who likes being truthful and so likes to speak up, i wouldn't do it so publicly for all the other world to see it only cos i'd so care for the person's feelings. everything is sooo gone just through this cold screen. thank you (:

THERE ARE LIKE A THOUSAND AND ONE THINGS TO LOOK FORWARD TO!!! august, september, october! i went to check the exam timetable today, my holidays OFFICIALLY STARTS 23RD AUGUST!! hip hip hurray!!! yippee ya ya yippee yippee ya~~~ (:

joycie
friends and family make me complete.
anything with the sun and sea makes me happy
dark chocolates.sunflowers. dedicated unconditional love and care
"Yet doe I feare thy Nature, It is too full o' th' Milke of humane kindnesse."

Bachelor of social work (not an easy path but it will work out, 6/6 to go!)
Japan
Melbourne
Turkey
New Zealand
there's nothing i want more than world peace.

October 2006
November 2006
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GR2
Jeerin.
Persis.
May.
Nelson.
yan darling.
Jenny darling.
xian darling.
xia darling.
ezah darling.
pauline.
ruey shan.
botak.
zhiyong.
eric khoo.
LohWC.
Gayathri.
Joyce Dearie.
Sister Qiz.
Sister Samantha.
Erika.
Jasmine.
Samantha.
Camen.
Belle.
Phionna.
CheryL.
Michi.
Stefanie.
Syaz.
Serve Cambodia
Serve Cambodia
Thong Kiat.
Jocelyn.
Dzul.
Kim.
JiSheng.

One More Day - Diamond Rio

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